The double burden of gender and race
I can’t name the organization because I still have friends and former colleagues there, and I don’t want to convict them with my words. Their example illustrates my observation that black and brown women must be as tough as nails to get anything done, especially in leadership roles.
I reported to a Black female boss in one of my roles years ago. She rocked as a leader. She is super competent, well-educated, of high integrity, and dedicated to her craft. She was not about the show (as other bosses I have had), but since she confidently knew her stuff, a lawyer by training, she entered a room with her full self. Well, mostly!
She faced significant challenges managing a white male subordinate. His resistance to her authority was as persistent as a shark hunting a bloody prey. Without her knowledge, he approved contracts, made independent decisions above his authority, and often put her in the difficult position of dealing with the fallout.
Part of the fallout was that very public and embarrassing, sometimes dangerously tangential to illegal or certainly unethical issues, would arise in the press triggered by actions outside her knowledge. Yet, many pointed to her, and all because of his actions. He viewed her authority as optional, an unbelievable joke of some perverse black workers’ affirmative action—in his mind, that is—an attitude that harmed her standing and damaged the organization. Her position ran counter to his beliefs of patriarchy and whiteness. It was too much for him to bear. Despite his self-destructive behavior, he seemed secure in his position — likely feeling that his status as a white man offered him immunity. Despite warnings, he pressed on with his agenda.
Tough as Nails or Soft as Sponge
Eventually, my boss had no choice but to fire him. That brave move sparked further backlash. He went on a smear campaign, accusing her of racism. He alleged that it was ludicrous when she was, in his opinion, a black affirmative hire, not for her doctoral law degree, but solely because she was a black person. Qualifications, in his mind, maybe fake or irrelevant.
To counter these accusations, I noticed she began mainly hiring white men, fearing further retaliation and reputational damage. You know how career circles are small, so she did not want to be black, or in her case, “white-listed.”
Unfortunately, her new hires were disastrous: two were ineffective, and one, my direct supervisor, had a serious drug problem and often didn’t attend work. The boss tolerated my supervisor’s absenteeism and poor performance, likely fearing to fire yet another white man. When he finally crossed a line by disappearing for months, she was forced to let him go. I told her one day, “If I had been even half as inefficient, you would have fired me a long time ago.” She knew it was true.
Even at a very high corporate level, the same thing applies. I listened to Jessica Alba talk about her experience launching her company, The Honest Company. As a Mexican woman and actress, she faced a lack of respect from white male executives who doubted her ability to lead a company to IPO. Their prejudices frustrated her, hindered her progress, and made the IPO much more painful than necessary. Her experience highlights how Black and Brown women are often seen as unqualified, regardless of their experience or vision.
In both cases, it’s clear that racial and gender biases create an almost insurmountable barrier for women of color in leadership, subjecting them to unique obstacles and skepticism. It’s hard enough for Black and Brown men to navigate this prejudice. Still, for women, the challenge is compounded exponentially by both patriarchy and racial bias, reinforcing a deeply flawed system.
What Should They Do?
The answer is not straightforward and can often be painful. I have a friend leaving her 25-year career in the NGO space promoting public and sexual health to pursue art and ceramics. Her stress came from a lack of support from her board and the overall challenge in this area of health by various state laws crippling anything that whispers about abortion or sexual health for women. She soon realizes she will be out of a job, so it is time to leave a leadership role where she thrives.
A decision to leave a job depends on whether you can see the changing times coming via who is in charge and whether you have an alternative. That same colleague above eventually had another higher-up woman in politics fire her because she did not want to approve specific projects that went against the laws. Remember, in the corporate world, dishonest bosses often try to get a lawyer to approve their shenanigans to cover themselves. Don’t do it. You could lose your license to practice as a lawyer, end up with a bad reputation, or worse, get marched out of the office in handcuffs and spend time in federal prison. Remember, private prisons always hunger for more food (I mean prisoners) to satisfy their shareholders.
Some women stick it out until it is nudged out.
Some start their own business. I always say that you should have a hustle, a side business you can do anytime you are not in the corporate world. In the end, if you are tired of the “black excellence” hamster wheel, you move from being an executive director of a major healthcare NGO to making and selling art and ceramics. That takes some realization of what the things are in life you should truely value. It’s more complicated if your identity is tied up in a career. Are you Executive Director or the present person acting as the Executive Director until someone else comes along? We sometimes fail to realize that unless you own the company and call all the shots, you’re often acting, even when certified. You are acting because they can ask you to leave anytime for real or false reasons.
I remember one of my mentors, when I elaborated on my office challenges, saying to promote and advocate for myself. Consequently, I traveled the world on every invitation to speak at conferences, be interviewed for print or digital media, write articles or studies, just about anything that put me in the limelight as a thought leader in my area. I also built a community of like-minded people around me. We found solutions to our problems or at least consoled each other. They were my emotional safety net. Having a safe home to rest and a supporting household was also platinum.
For experienced women in similar positions, prioritizing self-advocacy and community is essential. Maintaining a trusted support network of peers or mentors who understand these struggles can provide validation, advice, and emotional relief. My wife has a bunch of professional lady friends that she meets with monthly to shoot the shit—talk about business, ideas, emotional stresses, divorces, new love, and the like. They have an agreed-upon space to share all the things that black women go through, and each advises on how to help the other.
I know this is time-consuming, but within organizations, women should actively document instances of noncompliance. You must legally protect yourself. You must maintain clarity in situations that can be emotionally exhausting. The only option is clear communication about boundaries and expectations with subordinates, which is non-negotiable. The same goes for bosses who cross the line in behavior towards you. Stop that behavior, or it will constantly gnaw at your nerves and mental health.
Outside of the workplace, you must invest in professional development programs designed by and for black women. These programs help sharpen the tools needed to navigate these rough corporate waters. Some programs may focus on leadership, negotiation, and conflict resolution. They offer a safe space to learn and share approaches without ridicule or suspicion.
Also, indulge in a hobby that keeps you busy at home. It could be as simple as spending time with family or sewing or as complex as building websites or space-rocket programming. This takes your mind off work and may even give you the skills for your next job or your next business. I met a woman recently that joined the London Toastmasters to practice public speaking.
While these burdens won’t evaporate overnight, equipping oneself with knowledge, networks, and self-care practices can shift the rough times in the office into prospects of success rather than survival.
Please share your comments below on navigating office policies that challenge your professionalism.
